I often envision upcoming family gatherings, whether it be Christmas with my whole family or summer vacation with my parents,?as mini-vacations for me from being a mom.
This is how I envision it:
Greeted by my loving and supportive parents, they each scoop one of my two children out of my arms and coddle and play with them for hours on end. This leaves me with the free time I once encountered as a 20-something returning home. I have endless opportunities to kick back on the couch and watch mindless reality TV shows, most of which I?m unfamiliar with now since my television set is consumed by Team Umizoomi. When I bore of that, I can move over to the computer and catch up with some friends on Facebook. There is an array of home-baked treats of cookies, cake and cobbler that I gleefully indulge in. And after 4:00 p.m., let the adult beverages flow! Grandma and grandpa joyously put the kids to bed after a bubbly fun bath. I kiss my boys goodnight and the whole family join in on a good board game with laughter lasting until midnight.
This is how it actually went when I had an infant and young toddler:
Greeted by my loving and supportive parents, they each scoop one of my two children out of my arms. My infant decides he immediately wants his mom back. I grab him from my father?s arms and whisper to him that it?s okay, he?ll warm up to grandpa soon. My mom is already in the living room showing my toddler all of the awesome toys she bought for them. An hour into the visit, my mom starts a delicious dinner; my husband and I are left to corral my eldest so he doesn?t bust through the swinging doors of the kitchen, giving way to a land of endless knick knacks and breakable collectibles. Throughout our stay, it?s usually my husband chasing after our toddler while I breastfeed our baby and experience the only bit of ?pseudo-relaxation? I?d truly have in front of the TV. After grandma does bath-time, I lay in bed with both boys, singing until they fall asleep and I drift off, missing game night entirely.
This is how it went when I had two toddlers:
Greeted by my loving and supportive parents, they each take one child out of my arms and chase and play with them for about an hour until they are so worn out?they being my parents and not so much my kids. The rest of the visit entailed protecting my babies in a non-baby-proofed, two-story home with a glass table hosting four invisible corners, several chairs of which to climb upon, and four swinging doors that?ll snap your fingers off if not careful. That?s not counting the steep set of stairs leading to the bedrooms?and a fish pond outside. My husband and I found ourselves engaged in more of a workout from chasing, blocking and whistling ?interference? than we?d ever come close to at our home. Even our date night, spent at the closest restaurant while the grandparents watched the kiddos, involved a consistent wonder of worry in the back of our minds, only subdued by the second glass of Chianti.
Grandma?s mealtimes the rest of the week, without our booster seats from home, feature these two young bucks refusing to sit still for the extravagant meals my mother had worked hard on. By the third night, as my boys chased one another around the glass table screaming like wild barbarians, I caught a hint of curiosity in my father?s face. I could almost hear him thinking: how are you going to get these kids under control?how great of a parent are you, really? Needless to say, this entire four-day visit found me excited to go upstairs after a couple of beers at 9:00 p.m. to share a full-size bed with my two children. I am exhausted from all of the attention needed to keep them out of harm?s way and to be respectful of my parents and their home.
This is how it went this year with a toddler and a preschooler, Christmas at our house:
We greet my loving and supportive parents, each of them chasing a child up to their bedroom to check out their toys. ?My aunt and brother join in the games. As hostess, I find out how everyone likes their coffee and promptly pour each a mug. My boys are having a blast and I barely hear a word from them in the next couple of hours as I clean up from breakfast, prepare appetizers and set them out on our smartly decorated table. A frenzy of family flock to enjoy the snacks and a second round of beverages are handed out. I make the boys a plate and join in the fun. When my toddler has to go potty, I slip into the bathroom to remind him to pee in the potty and not on the floor. After I pull up his undies and pants, I notice everyone is back in the living room and I clean up the what?s left of the snacks. I begin the preparations for Christmas Eve dinner. In the island that is my kitchen, a few members of my family flitter by to ask if there is something they can help with. I let them. My dad suggests I join him in the family room and relax; I remind him everyone will want to eat again soon. We eat and then we clean. At 7:00 p.m., I?ve collapsed on the couch with a glass of red wine just in time to be reminded that its time to brush the kids? teeth and put them to bed.
This is what I know now:
I?ve found myself faced with the reality of caring for my progeny even when I?m in the company of my own parents. It?s not like my college loans they helped me pay off because they knew how stressful it was. This time, maybe a sort of pay-back, they are happy to play with their precious grandchildren and to help out, but they step back and let the new mommy and daddy handle the hard work. After all, my parents have done this already.
This year?s experience helped me appreciate how much my mom did as the hostess running the whole show from her kitchen.? It?s hard work keeping everyone, including your children, happy and fed.? I had a wonderful Christmas this year. So happy to be surrounded by family! ?But, I won?t lie, I am exhausted! I am learning with each passing year, the truth for moms?there are no real breaks.
Did you get a real break from being ?mom? this holiday or were you faced with a new reality?
?
Source: http://blogs.babycenter.com/mom_stories/no-real-holiday-time-off-for-moms/
park slope food coop anchorman sequel safety not guaranteed lifehouse al gore la dodgers lawrence o donnell
কোন মন্তব্য নেই:
একটি মন্তব্য পোস্ট করুন